A few years ago, Slate magazine posted an article titled The Poetry of D.H. Rumsfeld which included several unmodified quotes from Donald Rumsfeld in poem form. Sublime and thought-provoking, Rumsfeld’s poetry invokes – with depth and the wisdom of experience – the modern global condition.
OK, not really. He’s just a big evil dumbass most of the time. But unlike his big evil dumbass boss, Rumsfeld is strikingly articulate in his perfected idiom of equivocation and obfuscation. I also believe his mastery of the dependent clause to be unrivaled among his poet-politician contemporaries. I also have to grant that occasionally his statements, though obtuse and seemingly nonsensical, are quite profound. For example, Slate’s first pick – “The Unknown” – quite accurately described the situation America faced in Iraq (nevermind that going to war based solely on a fourth and unmentioned type of knowledge – the “fabricated known” – wasn’t a very good idea).
Anyway, I have painstakingly searched through web publications of notable Rumsfeld speeches and through the annals of the Department of Defense transcripts archive to bring you more examples of this man’s poetic genius. Enjoy.
What we’ve simply got to do is to,
As it did,
Came to a dead stop
And we were prohibited from
Going forward, the
Various studies that were put in place, the
Independent analyses that were asked for, the
Assessments that were made
Have now been coming in and
As they have it will require
That they be put together,
Analyzed and then
A recommendation made to the Congress.
— 10.11.05, Dept. of Defense Town Hall Meeting, MacDill AFB, Florida
More below the fold …
read more …
To my great relief, the ones I spent last Thursday morning worried about as I was making my way across Memphis are all safe.
On business travel all week, my days have been packed quite full, even so that I had to fly out on Monday – Independence Day – at 5am. Across the desert and over the plains, 2,369 frequent flyer miles to Memphis: home of Sun Studios, Beale Street, the world’s largest cargo hub and the pork BBQ capital of the world (I am a vegetarian so you can only imagine how profoundly exciting this was for me). Memphis is a typical Southern city in same the way that the platypus is a typical mammal. But statistically it represents well the modern day Southern town. Like its neighbours, it is home to a large (~50%) community of black people who overwhelmingly live in poverty. The average individual African-American income in Memphis is about half that of the average white person’s. Up on the twelfth floor of the Downtown Marriott, I was only blocks up Second Avenue from one of the worst areas of unemployment and homelessness in the city. Driving West toward the freeway, sun just beginning to glimmer off the Mississippi, I crossed over streets with names like Crump and Forrest; names shamefully reminiscent of the slavery and Jim Crow days that set the stage for the city’s current racial divide. And I, Whitie from the great white North, was happily exploiting, as I do, the business amenities offered to Whitie by just about every modern city. Memphis doesn’t hide its past though, so I guess I just noticed this time.
Anyway, there I was, in this strange anachronism of a city, as the USA turned 229 years old. Unfortunately, in Memphis, like most places in America, Independence Day isn’t about freedom from state-sponsored religion or the true meaning of democracy, or really anything more than trite nationalism, endless loops of “God Bless America” and unabashed pyromania (I was, sadly, cheated out of the last by a particularly ill-timed thunderstorm). I observed all of this; a tangential distraction from the purpose of my visit, but all the same a reminder of the profound iniquity that exists in this country that has spent trillions of dollars creating and then fighting the Taliban, Saddam Hussein, al Qaeda while letting its own live this way. The worn-out hollow platitudes about freedom seemed to me just preversions of something that once had meaning but now are just tools of the religious-military-industrial complex to rally any heretofore bench-warming flag-wavers around more of their dirty little wars. So I settled, eyes-forward and of singular purpose befitting my corporate whoredom, into my week. And so it went. Until Thursday.
Now, back at home in Seattle, I am catching up on the stories of spods, Raindogs, and co-workers from across the pond. I am relieved at their rational, mournful, hopeful and angry responses to the attacks. I am relieved that they didn’t react like Americans: the emergency response was flawless; people continued, resolutely, with their modern lives; Tony Blair went, briefly but immediately, to the injured city. It was all very impressive. I must say I do quite like old London. Their biggest failure appears to be that in the 229 years since the USA declared its independence, they have developed an utter and inexplicable loyalty to the foreign policy of the U.S. government.
So, what I have learned in the last few days is this: London doesn’t need my sympathy. It doesn’t need the inane prayers of empty-headed Floridians. It doesn’t need Mr. Bush’s resolve. It doesn’t need to be another battlefield of the “war on terror”. What it needs is independence from the United States.
I have a lot to say. But it’s all very disorganised and I haven’t had time to really think about how to express it all. Because I’m not very good at that sort of thing. What I am very good at is 4th grade math, so let me share some numbers with you:
The UN estimates 150,000 deaths in South Asia as a result of the tsunami. Relief organisations around the world, including in the United States, have heroically raised hundreds of millions of dollars to save lives and rebuild in the areas devastated by this disaster. The U.S. Government has pledged $350,000,000. That’s about $2,333 per dead person or, more relevantly, $70 per homeless person (1).
So what? Well. The death toll in 9/11 was 3,016, if you take the DOD’s high number (2). The total amount spent on cleanup by the U.S. Government after 9/11 pursuant to the 2001 Emergency Supplemental Appropriations Act for Recovery from and Response to Terrorist Attacks on the United States was $20 billion (that’s just the cleanup number) (3). Add to that the $6 billion in victims’ family compensation pursuant to the September 11th Victim Compensation Fund of 2001 (see 3) and that equates to approximately $8,620,689 per victim. If that’s not a fair comparison, you could imagine that every single victim had a family of 4 left behind (which they didn’t) and arrive at $2,155,172 per living victim in total government spending. That doesn’t mean the government gave each of those people $2 million, it means that’s the per capita spend in response to the disaster. It seems slightly higher than $70.
Still not convinced that Bush administration has mixed-up priorities? The total amount of money spent by the U.S. Government on perpetrating the Iraq War to date is approximately $148,000,000,000 (4). The total number of people dead as a result of this war, including U.S. soldiers and military personnel (5) and Iraqi civilians (6) is 16,332. The average amount spent in this war, per death, by the U.S. Government is approximately $9,061,964. It hurts just to read that number, so I’ll stop now.
Happy New Year.